Where am I going?

I know for many of you who have embarked on taking a look at my blog pages; you wonder what they are all about. I really didn't know what I wanted to write about at first. I want to give you a glimpse into the world of a black man's life in Mississippi. Then I thought why not just talk about some of my thoughts on the things I notice everyday. In the end I decided the blog should be about something near and dear to my heart, Love.
We all crave love. We all wonder lot of things about that one four letter word. Why do we keep finding to same type of people to love? What is it that I do not do that others do that get them the right person? How does I over come my fears of approaching someone I'm interested in? Even how do I get over a person I love who does not love me?
While I don't claim to have all the answers nor think I can have you to think like a man and act like a lady. Together I think we can work on this life's problem and solve it. I like to know what you are thinking also. Maybe with open honest dialogue we may just both come to deeper understanding of love. I keep myself as a open book like a dairy so that life's knowledge never past me by. I will began to define as many questions I get over these coming days and years. I hope that maybe I will have an answer to something that has been burning in you. I like you, the reader, to not only walk away with an answer but a way of handling you next love. Oh and if it isn't any trouble become a subscriber. Remember, It don't cost you a thing.

Why Do Men Go Down on Women

I got this crazy question this morning. Why do men go down on women? How crazy is that? I like to share some insight on this topic, but first let me ask the universal question. Why does anyone go down on anyone? It is a simple question with many answers. A many of us men as boys use to hear and say to each other this things. "You must be eating the pussy". I know you would like me to use the proper term but the slang word is what we used. We only use these words when we can't understand why a particular girl is treating a friend of ours like we would like a girl to treat us. So in a way, we thought that what makes a girl treat us like a king is because a boy went down on her. Though this may not be the case, it did make you wonder. As men we are always trying to find that thing which would keep a woman loving us for life. 
Ask any woman who has someone going down on her the way she likes it; she will tell you it is the best feeling in the world. Ask any woman who has never had it done right; she will say what's the big deal. Whose right? They are both right in this regard. All of us have wanted someone who has good love making skills on top of sparking the feeling we get for wanting to be with them. We look for the total package to complete our life. If we think we found that, we would marry that person. No questions asked. The funny thing is that we live in a society which inhibits the talk of sex which makes it so popular. I know ladies it seems sick to watch a porno flick with your man but that is a topic of another day. You must admit one thing your body did not come with a manual on how to handle it. Most of what you have learned came from trial and error. On top of that, what woman wants to teach a man something he could use with another woman.
With all that being said here is a simple answer; which many of you will disagree. We go down on each other because we love the reaction. Think about it like this. We are not being stimulated by the other while preforming oral sex. You gauge whether or not we are doing it right by the reaction the other gives you. In the end we want always know if it is done correctly unless our partner tells us. You must admit when it is done right for you, it feels damn good. And for those who have never had it done right, I want to offer my sincere condolences. You want understand what the big deal is until you have been there.

The Most Important Thing In Relationship

You ask anyone what the most important thing in relationship; the response will be trust. The truth of it is that you want to have trust in any relationship. Your trust is held more important than the love itself. I know you may think of it differently, but it is true. I say the most important thing in a relationship is communication. No relationship even begins without communication. It can be verbal or nonverbal but it is communication non the less.
There is a test I use to prove to people that love is not important. In fact it is the lest important thing when it comes to relationship. See we are all wanting to stay away from a place called unhappiness. Unhappiness is the disease we are trying to kill from our lives. The way we do this is to attack the symptoms that lead to love with a passion that overrides the fear.
I'll prove it by giving you a small test to see what leads you to love.
First I need you to pull out a piece of paper.  Next I will ask you question which allows you to choose which is more important to you. Remember you can only give from one of these choices nothing is equal one of them can only be your choice. Okay, write it choice down place to most important at the top and the least important on the bottom. I'll give you an example: what is more important Love or Communication? You say communication.
So, place communication above love. Next I ask, what is more important love or trust? If trust is more important place trust over love. Then test yourself to see which is more important trust or communication. Your answer is communication.
He is how your list should look:

• communication
• trust
• love

Okay now your have an idea of what I'm talk about, Let's get started. Which is more important love or communication? There is no wrong answer. Now which is more important love or trust? Okay which is more important trust or communication. Good, which is more important love or honesty? Well then, which is more important to you honesty or trust. Okay, which is more important honesty or communication? Interesting huh?
Okay, which is more important love or respect? It's getting tougher to answer some, huh. Okay, what is more important respect or honesty?  Now, which is more important respect or trust? Which is more important to you respect or communication?
By now, you are seeing Love is falling at the bottom of the list. This shows you that you need all these things before love. Oh, don't forget we are curing the symptoms of unhappiness. Each step is leading you to love. When you meet someone they have to meet the requirements listed there before you can start to say I Love You. I hope this will help understand a little more about love and how you choose who you will love.

Why Do We Cheat

I know every woman would love to know why men want to have multiple women. Basically you are asking why do men cheat. I am a man, and I have the secret to why men cheat. Do you really want to know why we cheat? Do you really want to know what makes a man cheat? I'll tell you what makes a man cheat. It's simple other women. You know when you as a woman is not doing the things you need to do to make him happy.

What I found is that when most start the process of cheating; it is not a conscious choice in the beginning. It is usually a matter of a slow and gradual process. It begins with having arguments in which all that needs to be said is not said. Think about some arguments you've  had in the past. I bet you'll  find that there are times that you making an argument when that person is no longer there. You do it in your mind, while you're driving your car, or sitting alone. You find yourself thinking about things you should have say to them which would have got your point across. Later on you try to bring the argument again just to say the things you wanted to say to get an understanding but It seems as though It is fallen on deaf ears.

When you are puzzle about how to get the person you love to understand you; sometimes you try to get outside help. You begin talk with others outside the relationship like friends, relatives, and even co-workers. They all try to help you by giving you the advice they would do themselves. Here my problem with that! I don't care whose giving you advise, They may say, "if I were in your shoes, I would do whatever". The truth is no one can be in another person shoes and not still be themselves. You know your situation better then they do. You are never going to tell much of the other person's side of the argument. You can't because you are not the other person and therefore you don't know what their interpretation of the argument was about.
I want you to remember that most affairs occurs at work. There are times when other people are going through similar situations. That person who chooses to talk with a co-worker about the things going on at home; usually finds a person dealing with something close to there own circumstances at home.

 Now this creates a position similar to two people meeting and getting to know someone for the first time. Do you see what I am getting at yet? These two people didn't start out with the intentions of cheating. They started out with the idea of getting help with the understanding of how to change the situations at home. They talk with the other person and then try to talk with the person at home. After a while of seeing words falling on deaf ears and continuing to talk the person at work, you find that you and the co-worker have similar beliefs about how things should be in love and relationship. All of a sudden, their eyes start to open. They think about the person at work more then the person at home. The person at home doesn't always know about the talks at work from you. You give up on trying to come to an understanding with them. She thinks she is just glad you stop bringing it up and it is over now we can move on to other more important things. The conversation has stop at home and more is going on at work.